We're turning into football fans...welcome to TX!

We had another fun night of football. Sadly our team lost but the girls looked cute dancing and we had a fun time. The weather was perfect, a touch of cool, no dive-bombing mosquitoes, a starry night. The kids got nachos and popcorn and we watched and cheered.

Today I am very excited I can walk without the crutches. Without the boot I am toast but with it it's kind of slow but way better than the crutches.

My friend Ruth is at the hospital. She's having baby number three. I am excited for her and hope it goes well.

Tonight DH and I are going with our friends to Pei Wei, I've never been and am excited to try it out.

This is kind of weird but there are three houses for sale on our street. Right across the street from me, 2 doors down from that, and one door down from that. There are a few others in the neighborhood but usually there aren't a lot for sale where we live so it's so odd to see them three in a row.

I missed watching Survivor last night. Luckily I

taped it. J went to with several friends to Siara and Sophia's house to make mums for the big homecoming game tonight. (not for S's school but for the school who's boundary we live). She didn't get home until after 11pm, which I thought was so ridiculous. Now I have the unpleasant task of deciding on an appropriate consequence.
Here's the story (you may input your ideas if you so chose:) ): For a week she's been asking to go the game on Friday. Last year she wanted to go and I said no. This year I told her I didn't really think she needed to since she's in 8th grade and doesn't even go to the school. She's been talking about it and telling me how so many of her friends are going and so many friends from church are in the band or on the team or whatever and it will be SO FUN, Please,Please, Please.
On Wednesday she asked if she could go to S/S's house because several of her friends were going and they were making mums for the game and she really wanted too. I finally said yes, not because she wore me down but because she convinced me that it would be fine and fun and she was VERY excited.
So Thursday they all ride S2's bus home from school. Around 4:30 I called her to make sure she made it safe and to ask her what the plan was. She is supposed to call me when she goes somewhere but I knew she was excited and wasn't mad that she didn't call immediately upon walking in the door, altogether I reminded her that she is supposed to do and to please try harder to call next time so I don't have to call her. She didn't know what time they were going to be done and asked if she could call in a while when she knew better. That was fine with me. In the meantime I was figuring out our evening. We didn't want to take Lucy to the game. Papa was at the temple all day with the missionaries but I got a hold of them in the evening and he said he would be happy to come stay with her so I called J back (this is around 6). She was gone but I talked to S2 mom and told her J needs to be home at 8:30. If she is going to be late she needs to call her grandfather and tell him they are working on the mums still and then she needs to be home at 9. S2 mom says fine I'll tell J. At 7 we left for the game. At 9:30 we got home. Papa says that J had called, they weren't done (which I was expecting) and she'd be home after 9. At this point I was fine with it. As it got nearer to 10pm I needed her home. She needs to sleep, we need to sleep, 5:40 comes early. So I called the home and talked to J. I told her she needed to come home. 10pm isn't exactly "after nine". She says fine.
10:45, I am mad. I call again and say I'm going to come get her, why isn't she home? She tells me they are just finished and S2 mom will drive all the girls home.
11:20 she comes home. S2 mom comes in to apologize and say they had to make 3 trips to the store and the girls were having such a great time she wanted them to finish, blah, blah, blah.

As soon as she leaves J turns to me, says sorry and can I still go to the game? She pretty much knew she was in trouble. We talked for quite a few minutes about what went wrong, different choices she could have made along the way including calling me and saying we're no where near done can you come get me, or can I stay later? I told her she'd be in trouble but we'd discuss the terms tomorrow.

Now I need to decide. I am leaning toward letting her go tonight to the game but then starting a 2 week grounding and having many extra chores. I think DH will want the grounding to be starting last night. Here's why I vacillate. Yes, she could have done things differently but she wasn't completely in control of the pace or when her ride could bring her home. She did call Papa at the designated time and said they would be later and I know in her 13 year old mind she felt like she had things covered. She spent $20 on the mum and is really looking forward to going.
Her friends are going to Paige's house after school to "get ready", I don't know why this takes 3 hours but it is part of the fun. Then going to the game, then spending the night at Mollie's. J wasn't going to spend the night because we don't allow sleep overs after school events (that's a different post however and was discussed at length at Gabriela's blog).
Now J is coming home to do chores. I think I'll let her met her friends at the game and then come straight back home after though. Then begins her life as Cinderella.

I want her to learn, I also want to be fair. I feel like DH and I are sometimes Mercy and Justice, I'll let you guess who I think is who. I know I can't rob Justice and I lean too much maybe to Mercy but hopefully we strike some kind of balance. Maybe that's why it's better to have two parents? It's much easier deciding what time a 2 year old should go to bed, or if a six year old is ready to go to a birthday party without mom attending. The teens are the tricky years. The fun years, but the tricky ones too.

One more factor: I feel like S2's mom should have respected our wishes and made it easy for J to follow her mother's directions. If it was me I would have said at 9 o'clock "your mom wants you home J. We'll finish yours get your stuff I'll drive you home." and DH could have supervised the other girls. Well, actually I would have taken everyone home and told them they could finish tomorrow, and I would have started the project earlier so that at 9 pm on a school night they were finished, but not everyone's perfect like me so....
There were a lot of things that could have gone differently and because of that I am feeling a little more leniency towards J. She isn't alone in the bad choices makers catagory. I could have gone right after we returned from our game and gotten her and left DH to get the kids ready for bed, but I didn't.
What would a "good mom" do???