Thursday, August 31 (which was a Monday 19 years ago)

19 years ago today my first baby daughter was born. This birthstory is not just the story of the day that a precious baby started her life but also the story of the birth of a mom. It is the point that I measure time by, the day that defines me. Once upon a time I was a kid, a teen. Then I was a mom and my whole world was different. Today I have been a mom as long as I wasn't. Crazy!

D was born on a hot August afternoon. I was excited but ill-prepared for her arrival. While I was pregnant with her I thought "how bad can it be?". I didn't know enough to even be nervous. We took a Lamaze class, but didn't finish because she came early. I also had some pamphlets that the doctor gave me that I read. This was before the era of the routine ultrasound and we didn't know she was a girl so we got ready by buying yellow stretchy suits and little nightgowns with red and blue bears on it. We had a second hand cradle and car seat and a stack of diapers and I considered myself ready. I am sure my mom and MIL shook their heads the whole time.

I worked until a few days before she was born and besides having a horrible backache the last four months felt great.
August 31, 1987 I woke up with cramps around 4am. I wasn't sure I was in labor and they didn't bother me enough to get up so I lay there excited and drifting in and out of sleep. Around 6 D's dad woke up to go to work and I told him I might be in labor. After a few moments of my uncertainty he decided to go to work and said to call if I thought it was the real thing. After he left I lay in bed a little longer and then decided I should get ready. I showered and putzed around . Had some more contractions, some that really hurt. Then I thought "uh, oh; this wasn't what I expected." I called Mark and told him and he said to call him back when I was ready to go to the hospital. I wandered around the house, flipped through the pamphlet (which didn't help at all) and around 10am he came home. I was relieved to see him because I had been sure for about an hour by then and wanted company. He asked if it was time to go and I said I didn't think so. We decided to take the dogs for a walk since we didn't know when we'd be back to take care of them. Frankly I don't know what we were thinking. We were gone a very short time when I decided I didn't want to do that so we went home and shortly after that my water broke. It was a flood. It was green. We headed to the hospital.

When we arrived at the hospital they put us in a room to observe us and decide if I was really in labor. I was having a lot of painful contractions and was pretty sure I was. Eventually someone decided I was and they moved us to a labor room. This was a room with two gurneys and a curtain in the middle. We shared a bathroom with the other couple. I labored there, laying flat on my back. It hurt A LOT. I literally couldn't see during contractions and was not a happy camper. After what seemed like an eternity I was complete and they wheeled me down the hall to the delivery room. I was told to scoot to the delivery bed and strapped into stirrups and told to push. Much to my relief pushing felt better than not so I gave it all I had. About half an hour later D came sliding into the world. I fell back and thought "thank heaven". After I caught my breath I looked up at my baby. The doctor said it's a girl. I started to cry. I was so surprised by the rush of love and joy I felt. She was the most miraculous creature I had ever laid eyes on. She was so ugly, squished up and swollen. But I didn't care, she was my baby! Her fast delivery was an ordeal for both of us. From the time I knew I was in labor until she was born was four hours. I ripped and had an episiotomy. Fun.

I got to hold her for a short time and then they whisked her away and I was moved to a recovery wing. A row of gurneys with moms but no babies. We lay there and stared at the ceiling. Mark left to call our mom's and I drank some juice. Eventually I was taken to my room and after asking for her for hours they brought my sweet little baby to me. Mark had left by that time but my brother and his friend came to hang out with me. When it was time to nurse they politely looked at the TV and I made a blanket tent and dove under to try and figure out what to do.

That night she cried all night. The nurses kept coming in to check on us, I am sure they thought "that teenage mom has no idea what she's doing". Yep. We went home the next day and D continued to cry for the next year. Despite that, I adored her. I found out how much I could love someone, and how little sleep I could live on. She grew to be the cutest, smartest little thing and I felt so lucky. Sitting in the hospital, holding her in my arms I was forever changed. Her happiness meant more to me than anything. I promised her I would do all I could to be a good mom, to teach her to love and serve the Lord, and to help her have a happy life.

She is now a wonderful, awesome young woman. She's living her life just the way I had hoped those many years ago and is such a joy to me. Happy Birthday!